are you kidding me?

i just got into work today and realized that no one dumped out my garbage. my peach flavored soy yogurt just sat here festering over the weekend. sick! i guess it would be a lot worse if it were real yogurt... BUT STILL!!! are the sanitations workers on strike again?

this brings me to my next subject... hired help. prior to this weekend, i was all about the diy (do it yourself). that is probably because i have never actually done anything myself. i come from a long line of help hirers, and felt it was my civil responsibility to stop the cycle. plus, don't they say, "if you want something done right, do it yourself and totally fuck it up?"

my master plan involved painting the office red. i have to admit, i'm all about choosing paint colors. it could really be a source of endless entertainment. however, i think that is really the only good part about painting. i would like to type more about this, but my right hand is suffering a rigor mortis (had to look that one up) of sorts after a day's worth of death grip on a paint roller. and... we still need another coat.

AND WHY DOES MY WHOLE BODY HURT?!? are you kidding? i didn't run a marathon... i painted a room for god sakes!

so, i really have decided that it isn't such a bad thing to hire someone to do things like paint, garden, clean, wipe your ass, etc. after all, it IS creating jobs, and i have a lot better things to do.