in a new fork state of mind

i was watching these shows the other night about body modification. they covered everything from tatoos, to artistic scarring to teeth filing. it was pretty cool because they always started in some remote african village where the tribal women (always the women, isn't it?) inflict excruciating pain on themselves because it has somehow become more "beautiful" to have snakes tatooed all over your face or to have all your teeth look like fangs. then the show will move somewhere like deuluth, minnesota or (in this case) snottsdale, arizona where they will highlight some social outcast who wants to have something insane done to his body because he thinks it is cool or likes horror films. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

in this particular instance, a scottsdale kid was having his tongue split. i didn't really watch the "procedure" because blood makes me want to hurl, but it didn't sound pleasant. like i mentioned above, the only reason he gave was that he thought it was "cool." ummm... okay. so you're telling me you are going to permanently split your tongue in half because your 18-year-old self THINKS (not knows) it is cool. i'm sorry, this doesn't sound like a very well thought out plan. i guess i would feel differently if you told me that you think reptiles are holy beings and you wanted to feel closer to god. but then i would realize that you are from scottsdale and, consequently, probably full of shit.

don't get me wrong... i totally understand rebellion. i had my tongue pierced when i was 18 because i thought i was being cool. 9 months later, however, i hadn't given any blow jobs and didn't really feel like my kissing had improved. furthermore, the roof of my mouth was often irritated, and i found myself EXTREMELY annoyed with people who flipped their tongue rings around in their mouth constantly. so... i took it out.

anyway, i guess what i am trying to say is that when you are 18, you are inherently stupid. you really shouldn't do anything to permanently alter your body. in fact, kind of like how now people are saying you shouldn't get married until you are at least 30, i'm going to extend that advice to body modification. don't fuck with yourself until you know who you are. sure, you like roses now... but maybe you'll end up being into orchids and then you'll be branded for life with a boring, ordinary flower on your ass.



in other news... i'm going to the big apple this weekend. i've managed to get some tickets to "movin' out" through my rehab connections (no joke!), so i'm pretty fired up about that. too bad they raised the terror alert yesterday. i'm in the process of trying to track down some xanax for the bf (he's already nervous to fly), so let me know if any of you are holding. sadly, my rehab hookups are more useful for scoring musical tickets than they are for prescription meds.