i think i can. i think i can.

this week's goal is to write two of my old professors to ask for grad school references. i have no idea why such a seemingly simple task feels so freaking insurmountable, but it does. all it requires is an email, explaining myself and humbly asking for help. no big deal... right?

GAHHHHHH! maybe i'm worried that they won't remember me. maybe they'll turn me down when i ask them. maybe they'll write something horrible!?!? eek! it is in these times that i remind myself of the alternative... i could never ask at all. i think the lifetime of disappointment i would impose on myself for not even trying is far worse than the consequences of 2 measly emails. don't you?

i think i've become accustomed to being goalless for the last 2 years. i'll have to get used to this whole aspiration thing. i fully expect you all to hold me accountable.